caught in a star's trail, i catch fire and get left behind... when i think about it, maybe thats how my situation is... and maybe its my fault for her feeling that way? this girl told me once its hard to love somebody when the person to be loved isnt there.. and thats where ive slipped... and also because of the phone call the last sunday when she wanted to apologise... i recognise the fact of her being a very paranoid and sensitive girl... i should have talked to her but instead i gave her the cold shoulder... but i was feeling really hurt by the fact that she rejected to receive my 99 dollar gift... 99 dollars means i had to work for two to three whole days... and it all comes to nought... i dont have alot of money... so this really hurts... maybe i should have bought my sisters clothes or my mom something she liked... sigh... what am i gonna do with a 99 dollar esprit bag? the memories attached to it hurt too much to let it stay... dangerous assumptions are always made about me... and she accuses me of that... ive a feeling that these baseless assumptions have directly or indirectly fueled this break up to take place... the only good thing to come out of this is to raise my poetic inclinations... a broken heart can propel one to great levels of creativity... but sometimes i wonder if my poetry is good, some people laugh at poet-types.. but i dont write about mushy stuff do i? corny stuff to be laughed at? i can only hope i dont.... so far nobody has commented negatively except for the fact that i have a dark gift... i wish i can be immortal, somebody special, to have inside me blood of kings...